I’m amazed at how vulnerable I feel as an artist when I create something that others are meant to experience.
I wrote a quick song last night, very roughly/poorly recorded, and swallowed hard as I played it for some friends who came by my office today. They loved the feel of it, but I still felt like a little kid approaching that moment when you look to see if they’re being nice or being honest.
Even at 40, though known primarily as a worship-related writer, my first love of writing thickly poetic songs is still hidden as I avoid exposure to others. Yet, those songs say what I want to say in the world more deeply than any pop-lyric.
The Church must feel like that, too, sometimes. Groans can only express the beauty we often taste in responding to God’s approach – like flowers bursting in myriad colors from a cold stone.
I think that deep down we don’t want to be laughed at, or be seen as attempting to be something we’re not. It’s the PoserFear.
The tenderness in that area of our hearts must be a gift, at the same time it feels as though it’s a curse.